Weaponized Assault Possum - T-shirt
Black / XS
$30.00
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Before mankind invented the MRAP, nature had already built one.
It just happened to be considerably smaller, angrier, and wandering around Texas at 2:00 in the morning.
The Weaponized Assault Possum: Nature’s MRAP takes the humble armadillo and gives it the tactical reputation it deserves: armored shell, night-vision capability, communications equipment, and the temperament of something that absolutely did not receive authorization for this operation.
TACTICAL.
ARMORED.
QUESTIONABLY LEGAL.
Built for anyone who believes wildlife becomes objectively funnier once you start assigning it military capabilities.
• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz./yd.² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US
Disclaimer: The fabric is slightly sheer and may appear see-through, especially in lighter colors or under certain lighting conditions.
Weaponized Assault Possum - T-shirt
$30.00
It just happened to be considerably smaller, angrier, and wandering around Texas at 2:00 in the morning.
The Weaponized Assault Possum: Nature’s MRAP takes the humble armadillo and gives it the tactical reputation it deserves: armored shell, night-vision capability, communications equipment, and the temperament of something that absolutely did not receive authorization for this operation.
TACTICAL.
ARMORED.
QUESTIONABLY LEGAL.
Built for anyone who believes wildlife becomes objectively funnier once you start assigning it military capabilities.
• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz./yd.² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US
Disclaimer: The fabric is slightly sheer and may appear see-through, especially in lighter colors or under certain lighting conditions.
Size guide
| LENGTH (inches) | WIDTH (inches) | CHEST (inches) | |
| XS | 27 | 16 ½ | 31-34 |
| S | 28 | 18 | 34-37 |
| M | 29 | 20 | 38-41 |
| L | 30 | 22 | 42-45 |
| XL | 31 | 24 | 46-49 |
| 2XL | 32 | 26 | 50-53 |
| 3XL | 33 | 28 | 54-57 |
| 4XL | 34 | 30 | 58-61 |
| 5XL | 35 | 31 | 62-65 |
| LENGTH (cm) | WIDTH (cm) | CHEST (cm) | |
| XS | 68.6 | 42 | 78.7-86.4 |
| S | 71.1 | 45.7 | 86.4-94 |
| M | 73.7 | 50.8 | 96.5-104.1 |
| L | 76.2 | 55.9 | 106.7-114.3 |
| XL | 78.7 | 61 | 116.8-124.5 |
| 2XL | 81.3 | 66 | 127-134.6 |
| 3XL | 83.8 | 71.1 | 137.2-144.8 |
| 4XL | 86.4 | 76.2 | 147.3-155 |
| 5XL | 89 | 78.7 | 157.5-165 |